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Why are huge challot displayed on the wedding couple / Bar Mitzvah's table?

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I noticed that among Orthodox and, seemingly Hareidi Bar Mitzvah's and weddings, a huge challah is cut by the chattan or Bar Mitzvah.

I assume that there must be some minhag behind this that originated somewhere for some reason. I don't think it's just to feed the attendants, because usually bread or rolls is available in a table bread basket or at each seating, and the challah is usually cut (esp. at weddings) long after people ate the appetizer / first course.

minhag wedding bar-bas-bat-mitzvah challah-shabbat-bread

share|improve this question

asked 8 hours ago

DanFDanF

35.7k529140

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  I haven’t seen this at Bar Mitzvahs, and at weddings it’s usually meant for everyone at the head table to eat their fill. Lots of people with big appetites necessitates a big loaf.
  
  – DonielF
  6 hours ago
  

  
  
  
  


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  It's typically recommended to make brachos on nice things. Particularly for a public hamotzi at a special occasion, it make sense to make praise Hashem for an extra fancy challah.
  
  – Heshy
  5 hours ago
  

  
  
  
  


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  It's a giant waste of food.
  
  – Double AA♦
  4 hours ago
  

  
  
  
  


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  1
  

  
  
  
  
  
  

  
  
  For the caterer to charge for more
  
  – Noach MiFrankfurt
  4 hours ago
  

  
  
  
  

add a comment | 

5

1

I noticed that among Orthodox and, seemingly Hareidi Bar Mitzvah's and weddings, a huge challah is cut by the chattan or Bar Mitzvah.

I assume that there must be some minhag behind this that originated somewhere for some reason. I don't think it's just to feed the attendants, because usually bread or rolls is available in a table bread basket or at each seating, and the challah is usually cut (esp. at weddings) long after people ate the appetizer / first course.

minhag wedding bar-bas-bat-mitzvah challah-shabbat-bread

share|improve this question

asked 8 hours ago

DanFDanF

35.7k529140

• 
  
  
  

  
  

  
  
  
  
  
  

  
  
  I haven’t seen this at Bar Mitzvahs, and at weddings it’s usually meant for everyone at the head table to eat their fill. Lots of people with big appetites necessitates a big loaf.
  
  – DonielF
  6 hours ago
  

  
  
  
  


• 
  
  
  

  
  1
  

  
  
  
  
  
  

  
  
  It's typically recommended to make brachos on nice things. Particularly for a public hamotzi at a special occasion, it make sense to make praise Hashem for an extra fancy challah.
  
  – Heshy
  5 hours ago
  

  
  
  
  


• 
  
  
  

  
  6
  

  
  
  
  
  
  

  
  
  It's a giant waste of food.
  
  – Double AA♦
  4 hours ago
  

  
  
  
  


• 
  
  
  

  
  1
  

  
  
  
  
  
  

  
  
  For the caterer to charge for more
  
  – Noach MiFrankfurt
  4 hours ago
  

  
  
  
  

add a comment | 

I noticed that among Orthodox and, seemingly Hareidi Bar Mitzvah's and weddings, a huge challah is cut by the chattan or Bar Mitzvah.

I assume that there must be some minhag behind this that originated somewhere for some reason. I don't think it's just to feed the attendants, because usually bread or rolls is available in a table bread basket or at each seating, and the challah is usually cut (esp. at weddings) long after people ate the appetizer / first course.

minhag wedding bar-bas-bat-mitzvah challah-shabbat-bread

share|improve this question

asked 8 hours ago

DanFDanF

35.7k529140

share|improve this question

asked 8 hours ago

DanFDanF

35.7k529140

share|improve this question

asked 8 hours ago

DanFDanF

35.7k529140

asked 8 hours ago

DanFDanF

35.7k529140

asked 8 hours ago

DanFDanF

35.7k529140

1 Answer
1

active

oldest

votes

3

There is a wide spread custom to distribute slices of the large challa to the friends of the Chosson and Kallah. I once saw (either in Nitei Gavriel, or another similar sefer I saw on minhagim) that this is based on the famous question posed at every marriage: 'מצא או מוציא' - every marriage has the potential to be ׳מצא אשה מצא טוב׳, or conversely to be 'מוציאו מן העולם'. Therefore immediately after they partake of it, we remove the ׳המוציא׳ from in front of them, as if to symbolize that only one option remains - that of מצא אשה מצא טוב.

That said, I don't believe this is actually a minhag; it's just that large Challos are considered celebratory and festive, ideal for the 'top-table' at a fancy do.

share|improve this answer

answered 5 hours ago

chortkov2chortkov2

1,78122

• 
  
  
  

  
  

  
  
  
  
  
  

  
  
  Will try follow up with source, if I can find it again
  
  – chortkov2
  5 hours ago
  

  
  
  
  


• 
  
  
  

  
  

  
  
  
  
  
  

  
  
  I thought it was מצא or מוצא אני את האשה כו׳. Not מוציא at all, which would then make המוציא irrelevant.
  
  – msh210♦
  2 hours ago
  
  
  

  
  
  
  

add a comment | 

3

There is a wide spread custom to distribute slices of the large challa to the friends of the Chosson and Kallah. I once saw (either in Nitei Gavriel, or another similar sefer I saw on minhagim) that this is based on the famous question posed at every marriage: 'מצא או מוציא' - every marriage has the potential to be ׳מצא אשה מצא טוב׳, or conversely to be 'מוציאו מן העולם'. Therefore immediately after they partake of it, we remove the ׳המוציא׳ from in front of them, as if to symbolize that only one option remains - that of מצא אשה מצא טוב.

That said, I don't believe this is actually a minhag; it's just that large Challos are considered celebratory and festive, ideal for the 'top-table' at a fancy do.

share|improve this answer

answered 5 hours ago

chortkov2chortkov2

1,78122

• 
  
  
  

  
  

  
  
  
  
  
  

  
  
  Will try follow up with source, if I can find it again
  
  – chortkov2
  5 hours ago
  

  
  
  
  


• 
  
  
  

  
  

  
  
  
  
  
  

  
  
  I thought it was מצא or מוצא אני את האשה כו׳. Not מוציא at all, which would then make המוציא irrelevant.
  
  – msh210♦
  2 hours ago
  
  
  

  
  
  
  

add a comment | 

3

There is a wide spread custom to distribute slices of the large challa to the friends of the Chosson and Kallah. I once saw (either in Nitei Gavriel, or another similar sefer I saw on minhagim) that this is based on the famous question posed at every marriage: 'מצא או מוציא' - every marriage has the potential to be ׳מצא אשה מצא טוב׳, or conversely to be 'מוציאו מן העולם'. Therefore immediately after they partake of it, we remove the ׳המוציא׳ from in front of them, as if to symbolize that only one option remains - that of מצא אשה מצא טוב.

That said, I don't believe this is actually a minhag; it's just that large Challos are considered celebratory and festive, ideal for the 'top-table' at a fancy do.

share|improve this answer

answered 5 hours ago

chortkov2chortkov2

1,78122

• 
  
  
  

  
  

  
  
  
  
  
  

  
  
  Will try follow up with source, if I can find it again
  
  – chortkov2
  5 hours ago
  

  
  
  
  


• 
  
  
  

  
  

  
  
  
  
  
  

  
  
  I thought it was מצא or מוצא אני את האשה כו׳. Not מוציא at all, which would then make המוציא irrelevant.
  
  – msh210♦
  2 hours ago
  
  
  

  
  
  
  

add a comment | 

There is a wide spread custom to distribute slices of the large challa to the friends of the Chosson and Kallah. I once saw (either in Nitei Gavriel, or another similar sefer I saw on minhagim) that this is based on the famous question posed at every marriage: 'מצא או מוציא' - every marriage has the potential to be ׳מצא אשה מצא טוב׳, or conversely to be 'מוציאו מן העולם'. Therefore immediately after they partake of it, we remove the ׳המוציא׳ from in front of them, as if to symbolize that only one option remains - that of מצא אשה מצא טוב.

That said, I don't believe this is actually a minhag; it's just that large Challos are considered celebratory and festive, ideal for the 'top-table' at a fancy do.

share|improve this answer

answered 5 hours ago

chortkov2chortkov2

1,78122

share|improve this answer

answered 5 hours ago

chortkov2chortkov2

1,78122

answered 5 hours ago

chortkov2chortkov2

1,78122

answered 5 hours ago

chortkov2chortkov2

1,78122